the week is finally over and i am glad it is. it had been a rather tiring week and having 4 hours of prac in one day was terrible, at least it was for me.
the first thing we had yesterday morning was chem practical. oag insisted that we had to do some chem class test which i am quite gek about. the first qns!! should have gotten it correct, but coz i was dumb, i got zero for that question. sigh. anyway, we had redox titration after the test and guess what happened? it's really really really damn lame and bizzare. as i was pouring the solution into the burette, my burette broke into two and i didn't even touch the burette!! had to pay $2 for that. that was the second burette i broke this year, and the irony is that in my 2 years of chem prac in sc, i didn't even break one burette, but now in hci, with just 3 and a half months, i have already broken 2 burettes. i am very glad that hci subsidies broken burettes, if not i would have had paid $30. sigh.
chem prac was super super draining coz for the rest of the day i felt deflated and stoned. i was just waiting for the 320 bell to ring; it seemed like forever. bio prac was bad. i couldn't concentrate at all, felt damn sian. i found myself reading the same line of the prac 5 times without understanding a single word, nothing went in. maybe the nervous tranmission of information from my eyeballs was faulty. hmm. or maybe the nervous transmission got blocked in my brain. i might be suffering from brain damage. oh no!
finally got my LCD screen! yay!
just read pple's blogs. i have realised a trend. at this stage, most adolscents like us are very emotionally unstable. i know this sounds lame, but technically, it is so. everyone seems to have problems but nobody seems to display it in front of others. emotional turmoil. privacy. distrust. cynicism. so young? the problem seems to be aggravating.
or perhaps, it's just the language. i realised that early this year, i found myself like this too. this is new. in sc, life was very straightforward and i never had such problems. life was relatively happier and simpler. i like that way of life. you may say i am childish, but isn't the latter a preferred and healthier way to live?
sometimes, i really think that these problems are actually not problems at all. it probably wouldn't even have existed if we didn't think so much and dwell too much on things. honestly, things have become more complicated after jc life started, maybe it's because there are more pple that we have to relate to, or perhaps it's because we suddenly realise that pple aren't simple creatures. well, then i guess if you only have this sudden realisation, you are damn slow. and don't tell me you are going to live in misery and cynisim for the rest of your lives and be a coward, that's utterly dumb. face your problems. even if it isn't easy, face it. stop running away. find your own solution. i know escape is the easiest way out and i must admit i have such thoughts a lot of times, but in truth, we all know that escape is not an option. escape is only a temporary solution; if the problem is rooted, then i suppose you should either solve it or direct your attention to other stuff.
whatever. i have no idea why, but i am getting quite pissed writing this entry. pissed with what? pissed with who? i have no idea. argh. maybe coz it's quite stuffy in my room. irritating.
reading blogs makes one depressed somehow. i guess blogs are outlets of emotions and feelings, looking from the way things are, blogs are very depressing works to read, i suppose even after i read some biography about war survivors, i wouldn't be half as sianified and affected as i am now. maybe blogs are bad things after all. i should stop reading blogs. i should stop blogging. blogging lets your inner thoughts out and even aggravates your turmoil even more; it straightens out your thoughts, emphasises the idea in your mind again again and again. even if you didn't mean to think this way, repeating the idea in your mind escalates the turmoil. sometimes not seeing the whole jigsaw, but just bits and pieces of it will make life more contented.
blogging is bad.
so stop reading my blog.
just on a lighter note. i am happy now even though this whole entry sounded very warped and out of the blue. if you don't understand a word i was preaching about, just take it as crap. blogs are crappy anyway. if you understand what i was trying to bring across, i guess that's good, but i won't give a damn whether you heed my advice or not, it's just a personal opinion. i like my life happy, sc style.
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